Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Fake it Until You Make it

The follow-up ultrasound takes place next Monday, and I made the active choice to stop obsessing and crying, at least for most of the day. I choose to talk about this birth as a healthy birth, in the proper time, and transmit my faith and optimism to the baby, who has hopefully by now gotten the message and done the needed repairs.

I am still surprised by some people's reactions to the pregnancy and impending birth, and yesterday was no exception. First, I got a call from an on again-off again client, who decided that now is the perfect time to sign up for consistent and long term Chiropractic care, after months to years of neglecting her body. I told her that I could pretty much only schedule for the next four weeks, because there was a strong likelihood that after such time I would start my maternity leave.

Dead silence on the line, then a tentative, "Oh, congratulations, I guess." And then a lengthy discussion of my professional responsibilities towards her, with a request to not abandon her.

Because my pregnancy is all about her...

I got another call from a Rabbi, with whom I had spoken several years ago in his role as a match maker. He had called me yesterday to clarify a posting I placed on-line, and inquired as to my general welfare, dating and otherwise. I told him that I was not actively dating right now, as I had larger and more pressing issues having to do with the birth. He got all excited and said, "So you got married!"

When I answered simply, "No, I am not married," again, about 30 seconds of silence on the line, and then he added, "Wow, you are brave lady. I admire you." Of course he made sure that I understood that motherhood was not mutually exclusive of my getting married some time in the future.

I will never expect to have full acceptance from the Jewish community regarding my decision, but then again, I never needed it in order to proceed with this most amazing of experiences.

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