Thursday, January 29, 2009

Pregnancy: One day you're in, the next, you're out

(With apologies for use of the catch phrase of model Heidi Klum, who seems to procreate like a bunny.)

Today, using the theory that counts from the beginning of my last period, I am six weeks pregnant. I have the nausea and vomiting, the sore breasts, the frequent peeing, and the fatigue.

Today, at the pregnancy follow-up exam at Hadassah, they expected to see a heart beat. They saw a large pregnancy sac, and the hCG levels were astounding, but they did not see a heart beat. The doctor called later to tell me that as far as she is concerned, something has "gone wrong" with this pregnancy, and that I should expect my period soon. A heavier period for sure, to account for the products of a natural abortion.

The doctor also said that if it would make me feel better, I could come back next week for another round of tests, to see if anything had changed; but that essentially, she believes in preparing women for the worst.

The way I see it, I know the insemination was done on January 1, and figuring in actual conception up to three days after that, I am only one month pregnant, and have not lost hope.
At least not all hope for the moment.

And I am trying very hard not to cry, I am not quite ready to mourn something that may in fact only be beginning.

1 comment:

koshergourmetmart said...

if you were inseminated on jan 1, you are a under 4 weeks after conception. According to dr spock, "the embryonic heart starts beating 22 days after conception, or about five weeks after the last menstrual period, which by convention we call the fifth week of pregnancy.The heart at this stage is too small to hear, even with amplification, but it can sometimes be seen as a flickering in the chest if an ultrasound is done as early as four weeks after conception."

The Doppler instrument
After the 9th or 10th week after your last menstrual period, you might be able to hear your baby's heartbeat at your prenatal appointment. Your obstetrical practitioner probably uses a Doppler instrument for this purpose, which bounces harmless sound waves off the fetal heart. The way the sound comes back is affected by motion, so a beating heart creates a change in the sound that can be picked up by the receiver in the Doppler. Whether you actually hear the heartbeat at 9 or 10 weeks depends partly on luck-the instrument must be placed at just the right angle. It also depends on the position of your uterus, and if you're slim or heavy. By the 12th week, the heartbeat can usually be heard consistently, using the Doppler instrument for amplification."

Don't give up!